đŁPodcast version of this Memo
There is one massively underleveraged and absolutely free tool. Having seen its tremendous benefits, I go about preaching âWrite things downâ. Writing down my problems allowed me to see my enemy concretely as opposed to a muddy whirlwind of negativity inside my head. Itâs easy for those thoughts to compound into an overwhelming feeling of loss of control. The less control I feel I have, the less I am able to effectively approach my problems.
What does it take? Literally sitting down, opening a new document, and asking myself: âWhat do I feel is off? What worries me? What are my derailers right now? What is in the way? What am I scared of?â Then, very honestly, without any censorship at all, answer those questions. Being radically transparent with myself will take bravery, but it will also bring a great deal of relief.
Lastly, treating myself as my child or my patient is very helpful. In that role, I am focused on effectively helping someone I love as opposed to criticizing myself and feeling ashamed. If I have to help my child, I must be brave enough to face the truth. This is also the best mindset for developing a pathway for resolving problems: one that is personalized, thoughtful, and kind. As my mom would tell me: âI wouldnât be honest with you if I didnât love youâ. So I remind myself:
Love yourself enough to face your truths on paper.
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